April 2009 'Useletter'
Welcome to April's Useletter. This month I want to share a few stories with you about enjoying life and being grateful for the little things. This whole global economic turndown seems to be making everyone negative. Even I am quiet (hint, hint) as companies are holding back on booking inspirational speakers – which doesn't make sense – this is the time when everyone needs to be motivated. To me it's a mindset. This should be the time when you reflect upon your life and be grateful for the smaller things. It is sad to see how most people judge their happiness according to their material worth – no wonder we are in an economic downturn. It's a mental downturn too! If you just look at all the good things around you, your health, your family and your friends. The beautiful country we live in. At the end of the day it is our inner thoughts which affect our outer behavior, and on that note – enjoy the first lesson.
YOUR WORDS, YOUR DREAMS, AND YOUR THOUGHTS HAVE POWER TO CREATE CONDITIONS IN YOUR LIFE.
What you speak about, you can bring about.
If you keep saying you can't stand your job, you might lose your job.
If you keep saying you can't stand your body, your body can become sick.
If you keep saying you can't stand your car, your car could be stolen or just stop operating.
If you keep saying you're always broke, guess what? You'll always be broke.
If you keep saying you can't trust a man or trust a woman, you will always find someone in your life to hurt and betray you.
If you keep saying you can't find a job, you will remain unemployed.
If you keep saying you can't find someone to love you or believe in you, our very thoughts will attract more experiences to confirm your beliefs.
Turn your thoughts and conversations around to be more positive and power packed with faith, hope, love and action.
Don't be afraid to believe that you can have what you want and deserve.
Watch your "Thoughts," they become words;
Watch your "Words," they become actions;
Watch your "Actions," they become habits;
Watch your "Habits," they become character;
Watch your "Character", for it becomes your "Destiny"
So.......To prevent any obstacles.......
GET OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY!
If I must reflect on my life right now, my two daughters are at an age where they are becoming so insightful and it is such a pleasure listening to their views and questions on life. The way in which they see the beauty in simple things is often a great reminder for me to 'come right' and stop fretting the small stuff. Hence here is a great insight to life, as seen from a young girl's perspective.
WINDSHIELD MESSAGE FROM A CHILD
One rainy afternoon I was driving along one of the main streets of town, taking those extra precautions necessary when the roads are wet and slick.
Suddenly, my daughter, spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat. "Dad, I'm thinking of something."
This announcement usually meant she had been pondering some fact for a while, and was now ready to expound all that her seven-year-old mind had discovered. I was eager to hear. "What are you thinking?" I asked.
"The rain;" she began, "is like sin, like all the negative stuff around us, and the windshield wipers are the good and the positive, wiping our negative away." After the chill bumps raced up my arms I was able to respond.
"That's really good." Then my curiosity broke in. How far would she take this revelation?
So I asked... "Do you notice how the rain keeps on coming? What does that tell you?" She didn't hesitate one moment with her answer: "Negative things happen all the time. When they do, we need to wipe them away. We must also remember that if negativity stops, just like the rain, it will come back again – that's just how it is. Then we just need to turn the wipes on again and wipe it away again. People always make it such a big deal. Why ? To flick the switch to turn the wipers on is no effort at all, and that is how all people should see it in real life. So when something negative happens, they should automatically switch over to the positive mode.
I will always remember this whenever I turn my wipers on.
Everyone want to know the real 'secret' to life and continually imagine it to be something complicated, phenomenal and insightful. In fact it's all about the lessons in this month's 'Useletter'. As in the storey below.
FAMILY
Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family we left behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than into our own family, an unwise investment indeed, don't you think? So what is behind the story?
Do you know what the word FAMILY means?
FAMILY = (F)ATHER (A)ND (M)OTHER (I) (L)OVE (Y)OU
THE SECRET
One day, one friend asked another, "How is it that you are always so happy? You have so much energy, and you never seem to get down."
With his eyes smiling, he said, "I know the Secret!"
"What secret is that?"
To which he replied, "I'll tell you all about it, but you have to promise to share the Secret with others."
"The Secret is this: I have learned there is so little in life that I need to be truly happy. I must live in the moment and take every day as it comes. I have learnt that most of the time I don't need half of what I think I do. My health, food in my stomach, my family and shelter, that's really the most important of it all. Since I learned that 'Secret', I am happy."
The questioner's first thought was, "That's too simple!"
But upon reflecting over his own life he recalled how he thought a bigger house and car would make him happy, but it didn't! He thought a better paying job would make him happy, but it hadn't.
When did he realize his greatest happiness?
Sitting on the floor with his children, playing games, eating pizza or reading a story. Spending quite time sitting next to his wife out in nature, and just appreciating the scenery ... the simple things in life.
Now you know it too!
Stop being materialistic and conditioned by the media and everyone around you. If there was no fuel, no electricity and no computers, would it really change who you are ? If anything, it would make you spend more time with your family and appreciate the simpler things in life. In fact you would be forced to do so and suddenly realize that this is the secret. But instead you let modern technology, stress and everything around you control who you are. STOP! And just start realizing that to be truly happy in life, it's the things that don't cost money, that are really important.
Someone asked me at a conference recently if there was anything in life that saddens me. Yes, the inability of people to accept each other for who they are, and to unconditionally love each other as fellow human beings. If everyone would only realize that life and people give back what you put in. See how the Chinese understood this thousands of years ago.
RELATIONSHIPS
A long time ago in China, a girl named Li-Li got married and went to live with her husband and mother-in-law. In a very short time, Li-Li found that she couldn't get along with her mother-in-law at all. Their personalities were very different, and Li-Li was angered by many of her mother-in-law's habits. In addition, she criticized Li-Li constantly.
Days passed days, and weeks passed weeks.
Li-Li and her mother-in-law never stopped arguing and fighting. But what made the situation even worse was that, according to ancient Chinese tradition, Li-Li had to bow to her mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in the house was causing Li-Li's poor husband great distress.
Finally, Li-Li could not stand her mother-in-law's bad temper and dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do something about it. Li-Li went to see her father's good friend, Mr. Huang, who sold herbs. She told him the situation and asked if he would give her some poison so that she could solve the problem once and for all. Mr. Huang thought for a while, and finally said, "Li-Li, I will help you solve your problem, but you must listen to me and obey what I tell you."
Li-Li said, "Yes, Mr. Huang, I will do whatever you tell me to do." Mr. Huang went into the back room, and returned in a few minutes with a package of herbs. He told Li-Li, "You can't use a quick-acting poison to get rid of your mother-in-law, because that would cause people to become suspicious. Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will slowly build up poison in her body. Every other day prepare some delicious meal and put a little of these herbs in her serving. Now, in order to make sure that nobody suspects you when she dies, you must be very careful to act very friendly towards her. Don't argue with her, obey her every wish, and treat her like a queen."
Li-Li was so happy. She thanked Mr. Huang and hurried home to start her plot of murdering her mother-in-law. Weeks went by, and months went by, and every other day, Li-Li served the specially treated food to her mother-in-law. She remembered what Mr. Huang had said about avoiding suspicion, so she controlled her temper, obeyed her mother-in-law, and treated her like her own mother.
After six months had passed, the whole household had changed. Li-Li had practiced controlling her temper so much that she found that she almost never got mad or upset. She hadn't had an argument with her mother-in-law in six months because she now seemed much kinder and easier to get along with.
The mother-in-law's attitude toward Li-Li changed, and she began to love Li-Li like her own daughter. She kept telling friends and relatives that Li-Li was the best daughter-in-law one could ever find. Li-Li and her mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real mother and daughter. Li-Li's husband was very happy to see what was happening.
One day, Li-Li came to see Mr. Huang and asked for his help again. She said, "Dear Mr. Huang, please help me to keep the poison from killing my mother-in-law! She's changed into such a nice woman, and I love her like my own mother. I do not want her to die because of the poison I gave her." Mr. Huang smiled and nodded his head. "Li-Li, there's nothing to worry about. I never gave you any poison. The herbs I gave you were vitamins to improve her health. The only poison was in your mind and your attitude toward her, but that has been all washed away by the love which you gave to her."
MORAL: Have you ever realised that how you treat others is exactly how they will treat you?
There is a wise Chinese saying: 'The person who loves others will also be loved in return.'