March 2010 'Useletter'
February is way to short, I'm missing a few days! Anyway, managed to get the March 'Useletter' out in time. How has your year been up until now? I definitely feel a more positive business attitude in the air and everywhere I go, everyone is trying anything and everything to come up with clever business plans. It's so refreshing to see.
Check out my You Tube quick tips this month of 'De-Stressing', shot in a safari park in South Africa. Click on your language of choice: English,Afrikaans, German
How do you wake up in the morning? Depressed or happy? There are many reasons people don't look forward to their day and many simple solutions to that problem. One, is to be thankful as you open your eyes, especially for the things we take for granted. It kinda puts things and life into perspective and makes you realise that we have many reasons to be happy. Here's an sms I received from a friend on a conference this month which I thought really brings this point across well.
BE THANKFUL
The only time you appreciate what you have is when you loose it. Be grateful today for all the universe has given you; parents, health, wealth, peace, dignity, home servants, world comforts, beautiful healthy children and friends. You have been blessed with more, than most people in this world. Remember, what we have today, you can loose tomorrow. Never take for granted all the things in your life, and most of all, enjoy what you have every day.
I thought this very interesting. Who is grateful for peace and dignity? These are things we all take for granted ... but we shouldn't. There are countries on this globe where those things don't exist! What I found was powerful was the sentence, "What we have today, we can loose tomorrow." I keep on talking in my Keynotes about the most precious asset we have in life - TIME - don't take your time on this earth for granted and realise that NOW is the time to enjoy. Give thanks to those little things that brighten up your day, a smile shared with a stranger, a hug from your child, or even a joke shared amongst friends. Guess what? This keeps you humble and appreciative. Way to often we take everything for granted and expect. If you look at 90% of the problems around you, it's because of expectations. Stop expecting, give more and be thankful for everything you have. Suddenly you'll find that life becomes more meaningful.
SAVOUR EVERY MOMENT
One day a woman's husband died, and on that clear, cold morning, in the warmth of their bedroom, the wife was struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn't "anymore". No more hugs, no more special moments to celebrate together, no more phone calls just to chat, no more "just one minute." Sometimes, what we care about the most gets all used up and goes away, never to return before we can say good-bye, say "I love you."
So while we have it, it's best we love it, care for it, fix it when it's broken and heal it when it's sick. This is true for marriage......And old cars... And children with bad report cards, and dogs with bad hips, and ageing parents and grandparents. We keep them because they are worth it, because we are worth it.
Some things we keep -- like a best friend who moved away, or a sister-in-law after divorce. There are just some things that make us happy, no matter what.
Life is important, like people we know who are special. And so, we keep them close!
Suppose one morning you never wake up, do all your friends know you love them?
I was thinking...I could die today, tomorrow or next week, and I wondered if I had any wounds needing to be healed, friendships that needed rekindling, or three words needing to be said.
Let every one of your friends know you love them. Even if you think they don't love you back, you would be amazed at what those three little words and a smile can do.
And just in case I'm gone tomorrow.
.. Live today because tomorrow is not promised.
On another note, stop giving up so quickly and complaining about everything around you. Once you appreciate what you have, it kinda opens a new door in your mind and makes you realise that you must take responsibility for your own life and put 100% into every opportunity that comes your way. Even my two girls, just spending time tickling them, or being silly together, I am thankful for that time. But above all, even they are too, Before they go to sleep, they say how grateful they are for the good times we spend together during the day. And because of this, my oldest daughter, who turns 13 this month is now training for the olympic gymnastics. I am in awe of the dedication and discipline she has (My wife and I must be doing something right). She has really learnt the concept of being thankful and trying and trying again until you get it right. How many adults today understand this. Here is a wonderful story by an unknown author about being successful. Maybe you can share this lesson with your children.
LAW OF THE SEED
Take a look at an apple tree. There might be five hundred apples on the tree, but each apple has ten seeds. That's a lot of seeds!
We might ask, "Why would you need so many seeds to grow just a few more apple trees?" Nature has something to teach us here. It's telling us: "Not all seeds grow”. In life, most seeds never grow. So if you really want to make something happen, you had better try more than once."
This might mean:
You'll attend twenty interviews to get one job. You'll interview forty people to find one good employee. You'll talk to fifty people to sell one house, one car, one vacuum cleaner, one insurance policy, or a business idea. And you might meet a hundred acquaintances just to find one special friend .
When we understand the "Law of the Seed", we don't get so disappointed. We stop feeling like victims. We learn how to deal with things that happen to us. Laws of nature are not things to take personally. We just need to understand them - and work with them.
IN A NUTSHELL: Successful people fail more often. But they plant more seeds.
When Things Are Beyond your control, here's something that you must NOT DO so as to be happy: You must not decide how you think the world SHOULD be. You must not make rules for how everyone SHOULD behave.
Many times, such thoughts can bring you spiralling down into more unhappiness. On the other hand, let's say you expect that:
Friends SHOULD return favours
People SHOULD appreciate you.
Planes SHOULD arrive on time.
Everyone SHOULD be honest.
Your husband, partner or best friend SHOULD remember your birthday.
These expectations may sound reasonable. But often, these things won't happen! So you end up frustrated and disappointed. There's a better strategy. Demand less, and instead, have preferences! For things that are beyond your control, tell yourself:
"I WOULD PREFER "A", BUT IF "B" HAPPENS, IT'S OK TOO!"
You prefer that people are polite... but when they are rude, it doesn't ruin your day.
You prefer sunshine.. but if it rains, it is ok too!
To become happier, we either need to:
a) Change the world, or
b) Change our thinking.
It is easier to change our Thinking!
IN A NUTSHELL:
It is not the problem that is the issue, but rather it is your attitude attending to the problem that is the problem. It's not what happens to you that determine your happiness, but rather how you think about what happens to you!
Have an awesome month